Not falling apart
by Lost2Love
Summary: Songfic: Not falling apart by Marron 5: Gof: Neville is sad after the ball with Ginny. Please read! XD


**Not falling apart:**

_**Danced all night, sleep all day**_

_**Careless with my heart again**_

_**Fearless when it comes to playing games**_

I woke up with the memories of the dance still fresh in my mind. And the picture of Ginny in that dress still gives me butterflies. I wish I could relive it all but I know I will never again.

_**You don't cry and you don't care**_

_**Afraid to have a love affair**_

_**Is that your ghost or are you really there?**_

You don't care about me, you care about Harry. And I was too naïve to notice. Through out the whole ball, you weren't really there to have fun with me, but to just be there for Harry.

_**Now I can't walk and I can't talk anymore**_

_**Since you walked out the door**_

_**And now I'm stuck living out that night again**_

_**I'm not falling apart**_

I sit up on my bed and put my feet on the floor. They are still sore from last night. Last night… how that night turned so bad… I close my eyes, in hopes, that the images of that night will leave me, like she had-

No!

I won't think about what happen…

_**Wither on a sunny day**_

_**Time slows down, I'd wish you stayed**_

_**Pass me by in crowed dark hallways**_

Slowly I get off my bed and to the bathroom and get ready for the day. Once I was clean and dressed I went down to the great hall without waking any of my roommates.

Walking down to the great hall, I pass a window to see the bright sun light. I look out to see the beautiful scenery, how I wish it was gloomy so it can match my mood. I stare out the window what seem like hours and I can't help but think, Ginny would have liked this view. It's as beautiful as she was at the dance…

No! Stop thinking about the dance, Neville!

I look away from the window, slowly walk the lightly brighten hall and daydream: about the memories of this hallway and Ginny in my arms…

_**Try my hardest not to scream**_

_**I find my heart growing weak**_

_**So leave your reasons on the bathroom sink**_

I stop and with sudden anger I hit the wall with all the force I could muster. The pain numbs my aching heart, and let my forehead rest on the wall. I slowly crumble to the floor. What should I do, without you?

_**Now I can't walk, I can't talk anymore**_

_**Since you walked out the door**_

_**And now I'm stuck, living out that night again**_

_**I'm not falling apart**_

I sit there and fight the memories of you and that night…

I want to scream, curse, and laugh at my insanity because the thought of you has my world falling down with every breath… And I can't help but tear my heart into more pieces, just to see you again.

But I don't want to fall apart…

_**I heard you say you need me**_

_**Now what the problem? I can't see**_

_**You destroyed me, I won't fall apart again**_

_**I'm not falling apart**_

"_Neville, please take me to the ball!" you smile at me._ I thought you wanted to really be with me, but now I know that was a lie. You hurt me for your chance at something more important to you…

No I won't think about it anymore!!! I can't take it!!

I can't… I just can't…

_**Take what you wanted**_

_**And I will be just fine**_

_**You will be better off alone at night**_

Have my heart because it is too much of a burden to keep it. I will live without it… You don't need me… You seem better that way…

_**Waiting and Falling **_

_**Constantly calling out you name**_

_**Will it ever change?**_

_The ball was near it end and Ginny was nowhere in sight, I look for you to find…you and Harry snogging… "Ginny?" you turn with sadness in your eyes. "Neville, uh…" I put my hand up. "No, need to explain." I say with sadness and turn to leave._

_**Now I can't walk, I can't talk anymore**_

_**Since you walked out the door**_

_**And now I'm stuck living out that night again**_

_**I'm not falling apart**_

_You caught up with me, "Neville, I'm sorry I leaded you on. It just would never work out…"_

"_That's complete rubbish!"_

"_Neville! I'm sorry that I'm in love with Harry!"_

"_How can you be in love with Harry, when you told me you were in love with me?"_

_You look down with guilt._

"_That was a lie, right?" I ask staring straight in your eyes._

"_Neville-!"_

"_Save it." I said coldly before walking away._

UGH!! MEMORY, LEAVE ME ALONE!! STOP REPLAYING IN MY MIND!!

_**I heard you say you needed me**_

_**Now what's the problem? I can't see**_

_**You destroyed me, I won't fall apart again**_

_**I'm not falling apart…**_

I need a walk… I will be better after a walk…

I walk to the black lake, seeing the sun slowly rise up… the color of you hair stains the sky with yellows and orange…

I drop to my knees and break down and stare at the cursed sky to bring me so much pain…

Ginny… I'm falling apart with out you…

_Thanks for reading and PLEASE REVIEW!!! XD and tell me what you think!! Sorry if Neville is emo… I felt a little emo… ___

_Until the next story!_

_~Lost2Love~_


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